Zane doesn't trust my husband.

[beckybeird]

Zane and my husband have not clicked. We have had Zane for about 6 months. My kids and I adore him, but my husband is pretty indifferent to him. He is gone a lot for work. He came home Sunday and things were fine. Until Tuesday night. My daughter ran by my husband and he grabbed her and threw her up in the air. She screamed and Zane tried to bite him. My husband is pissed. I see both sides. My dog is protecting my kids from someone he doesn't like or trust. I put Zane in his bed in time out. I'm not sure how to make this better. My husband doesn't want Zane in the house. I told him Zane is not going anywhere. I just need to figure out how to fix them. Zane has never even growled at someone. I truly believe he thought my husband was hurting my daughter. I'm going to talk to the trainer but I need help!!

[Tucker's Mom]

My husband and I can't tease each other (poke, tickle, etc.) without Tucker's involvement. He'll do this kind of growl, bark, play bite thing. He's never aggressive about it, but it's like he's the referee. He will also body block one of us afterwards.

This is a problem that's not going to get fixed unless your husband gets on board. Maybe he needs to sleep outside!

[beckybeird]

My husband and I can't tease each other (poke, tickle, etc.) without Tucker's involvement. He'll do this kind of growl, bark, play bite thing. He's never aggressive about it, but it's like he's the referee. He will also body block one of us afterwards.

This is a problem that's not going to get fixed unless your husband gets on board. Maybe he needs to sleep outside!

Already told him he goes long before Zane goes. . I missed the initial "attack" of my "vicious dog". I came in when it was ending and put him in time out. I watched them yesterday playing. Husband grabbing the daughter and Zane was jumping around bowing, barking, growling and play biting. I just don't think Zane is vicious. Seriously. I think my husband is vicious.... Lol.

[DPU]

How does Zane react when you do the same thing to your daughter. Sometimes this is a very typical reaction when there is excitement activity going on and one of the dogs wants to tone it down.

[Greenmagick]

This is a pretty common thing when children scream (in play or anger) and the parent is picking them up, wrestling with them etc. They think they are "helping" or sometimes its amped up play.

Work on desensitizing him to it. Watch for signs he is about to join in and block him. Give him an alternative behavior you do want.

[fets]

If I hug my mom, Macho will get in between us. I think he was just trying to protect your daughter. Your husband needs to man-up. Something easy would be to leave some treats in his glove compartment, and give one to Zane and a love pet when he comes home. I'm not married but if I start dating someone and they aren't interested in my dog, they get exed off. I hear you, Macho comes first for me too!

[Desertnate]

I'm not sure how current the photos are, but they look like Zane is pretty young yet. Are you sure the pup wasn't trying to get into the play? Is he mouthy or nippy when he plays? Your description of him bowing and all makes it sound like he's trying to join in.

To this day I can't play with my girls on the floor and our pup is over five months old. As soon as we start playing around we have a big, slobbery, hairy, uninvited playmate join in. When she was younger she would nip and mouth as well (something we've mostly corrected now). None of it to defend anyone from someone else...she was just trying to join in on the action.

[fets]

Yea bowing is a behavior that indicates the dog wants to play. That and sometimes Macho just wants to literally do a downward dog and stretch.

[Alanna7777]

Bowing away...Dova tries to jump in on the action all the time if my husband and I are kidding around. He also bows to our cat, barks and growls all playing but Simba doesn;t find it funny AT ALL!! He also will push his toy at Simba asking him to play...like he does to me LOL! Sounds like your guy was trying to have fun too!! He is a kid too....he doesn't know he is a dog kid LOL.

[jrturk]

Lola gets in between us if we hug, dance, wrestle. We call her the fun police...no having fun if she's not involved!

[Tylerthegiant]

Bottom line is you don't know why it happened because you didn't see it. Also, your DH was not really harmed, right? No contact with skin? If Zane really wanted to hurt him, he'd be hurt, it sounded like he used bite inhibition.

The situation, I know you know, requires watching and evaluating and all perspectives need to be taken seriously. Your DH has a hard case to make that he takes no involvement with the dog and wants to call the shots with what happens to the dog. A dog is a in pack, and everyone needs to be involved.

It sounds like he's just plain ticked that a dog he feeds, houses, pays medical bills for, and should be a grateful, loyal and adoring servant of the family dared to try and bite him. But dogs are so much more complicated than that most of the time.

I would guess there is some resentment there of some kind for some reason, may be he didn't want a dog, he didn't want that breed of dog, he resents the added the responsibility with the dog with other things he does, jealousy even? But the fact he has no involvement and was so quick to banish Zane tells me there's an issue there of some sort. That needs to be worked through as a family. Whatever those feelings are real and serious to him, and he may be hiding the extent of them. You need to find a way to really and truly change his mind and get him on board.

[my3bbdanes]

In order for the dog to be stable - the family ALL need to agree to how the dog it to be treated and what behavior are desired and disallowed. And, sorry Dad, the dog is not going to trust or respect you if you don;t get involved with it and make him your dog,too. Given the current state of things, I would say dad needs to feed the dog and walk him for FUN. Or do SOMETHING that helps the dog bond.

That said - Rules are rules - and no biting is ...humm...let me see...at the TOP of the list?! Yep! At the very top!!!

Do not make excuses or explain. Just extinguish the behavior.

IMO - start by not allowing the dog to jump around and be excited when you are roughhousing with each other. It is time for calm dog behaviors to be praised as the best thing in the world, and any excited behavior that COULD lead to over-excitment and biting to be stopped, calmly, without emotion, and the dog sent to a bed or someplace to lay down.

Also time outs don't work unless they are very brief and yiou are constantly supervising and allow the dog to return immediately upon exhibition of the desired (calm) behavior, so that the interaction can take place AGAIN and see if the dog chooses the correct (desired) behavior...and so on...

Nipping and biting should be immediately reprimanded (a strong NO and DOWN) by the adults (and kids IF they are old enough & dog smart)...post reprimand the dog is ignored for a minute - tho kept nearby, and then given a command for a behavior he knows how to do, and praised for doing it, then life goes on as normal...

as always - just IMO -

[andipanda 1]

I might also start making dh (dear husband or dumb...you pick!) do SOME activities with the dog. Hand him the dog bowl and have him put it down for the dog (ie the dog see's him as feeding him) - thus your boy has a more positive connection to dh, dog gets excited to see dh, dh reacts better. Hand dh treats to hand to dog when dog is being calm. Get dh to hold the leash when taking a family walk.

You can tell dh that you are re-training the dog. don't tell him that you are using behavior modification on HIM. Husbands get miffed when they are told that. But....if the shoe fits.....

Look at your training for the dog, and make it work for the stubborn one in the house.

Andi

[TheGreatDane]

Sounds like your husband needs to make an effort to be a bigger part of that dogs life. His punishments may also be a lot different than yours when you are not around. He could be spanking the dog or have done it when the dog was growing up and maybe the dog just doesn't like him now. Not saying that has happened you just never know.

[ChaoticLiving]

We haven't had this happen yet, but it is SO possible in our house too. My husband didn't want a dog, just said I could have one because he knew it would make me happy, and now he has to live with her. Our puppy will be five months old on Sunday, and has a lot of growing up and training yet to do.

Since my husband didn't want a dog to begin with, things she does tick him off much faster than anyone else (I have a 16 year old son and a 10 year old daughter), and he is much quicker to reprimand her, often in anger. I told him the other day that I'd like him to come with us to the puppy training classes, and he said he spends more of his life involved in puppy than he wants to already and will welcome the time to himself while we are all gone at the class.

So I know where you're coming from, dealing with a man who wants the dog to be different but doesn't want to have to be involved. Hopefully the advice the other people have posted will help.

I'm inclined to agree with other people that Zane really just wants to get in on the obviously fun time being had with Dad, and it sounds to Zane like the play is rough because his "sister" is screaming. The trick is to help Zane figure out what he's supposed to do when that kind of thing happens.

If it were my family, I would probably distract Zane by having him play with you (not rough-housing - maybe practicing some fun commands) while your husband is playing with your daughter. And when your husband isn't there, use the tricks other people have said to teach Zane to be calm when your daughter is running around and shrieking. Then eventually you can use the same commands on Zane when your husband is playing with your daughter.

Also, I like the idea of having treats in his car that he gives Zane when he gets home. I might try that one, and sneak in having him help train the puppy after all!

Good luck!